If there really are only shakers and movers, this guy is a mover – and a quick one at that.
Just look at the way he runs people through (although not with a sword or any other kind of sharp object, at least not on the ballfield). In fact, he seems to make getting run through significantly less unpleasant than it used to be, only slightly better than walking the plank.
This is Matt from Broad St. Ballers (Royal) and he and his team are back in the action with their eye on the prize (bar money, of course). Matt’s a helluva quarterback with a helluva good set of feet on him, making it possible for him to zip past the defense and advance, like they did in the final 15 seconds of the match to break a tie. (It also causes all the pictures to be a little blurry – I swear it’s his super speed and not some silly twit fumbling around with the camera!)
A good pair of feet are a valuable asset, just ask Dr. Scholl. I wonder if he played Football too?
Which means that she looks good while out there blockin’ them shots. The Corner Kick Kids (Red) had some serious offense going in to the second half of the game, but with defense like this they’re gonna have a hard time making it stick.
This woman from Foot Soldiers (Royal) was defending her goal like a mama bird pecks at anything in a five-foot radius of a newly hatched chick. At one point she gave the most graceful slide kick (toward the ball, not the players) knocking out a shot mid-stride from right in front of the net, not unlike that one movie where they tried to blast an asteroid out of the sky with a missile. Wasn’t that a documentary?
I mean, it’s not really swimming when you’re paddling away in an oversized inflatable doughnut. He might not be any good at it, though he’d probably just go under and swim up through another tube so fast nobody would notice.
Well, he may not have super swim speed, but I’d be willing to bet that this guy from Drunkin Donuts (Orange) could paddle fast enough to leave Aquaman in the dust. He repeatedly got such a fast start from the wall that the other team couldn’t get to the ball first. In fact, Aaron here from Nacho Pool (Yellow) and he kept running into each other as if they were riding bumper cars. The only difference is the water, and the lack of cotton candy. (Hint, hint, game coordinator)
I know, sounds hot right. Who doesn’t like scoring in the rain? And I’m not talking about some sissy New York City torrential downpour, I’m talking about gettin’ your groove on at a Florida beach during hurricane season rain. Now that’s hot.
These guys and girls thought of a totally different way to score, but at least it still involves balls – well at least one ball, though it looks like the elephant man’s. (Wait, should that be capitalized? Is that they guy’s name now?)
Between these two teams, that ball saw some serious action too. Purple Monkey Dishwasher (Daisy) gave the ball a lot of foot-lovin, and Sweetdiculous (Kelly) gave it some serious ball-on-net friction. Either way, that ball is gonna be sore and needin’ a cigarette after this match.
And she’s Bowling like she’s never bowled before. Actually, in this case she really is dancing – wildly. This is Nicole, previously known as Nixxx though now promoted to Mega Nixxx, and she’s got moves that could light up the dance floor (or Bowling alley). She’s back with her team EZ RollerZ (Black) and is ready for some ball throwin’, foot shakin’ action.
Does all that shakin’ and movin’ really help knock out the pins? Well, when you’re having this much fun it doesn’t really matter. We caught her few times, though be sure that she’ll be dancin, and Bowlin’, the night away.
People say that dancing takes some pretty fancy footwork, but no ballet I’ve ever seen (that’s a lot, by the way – no I’m not ashamed) ever involved running in three consecutive differing directions while dodging the hungry hands of four people.
Enter Endzone Celebrasions (Indigo) with some flight of feet that would make Baryshnikov grin with delight and excitement. He evaded four people – a total of eight possible hands for those of you mathematically challenged out there – in one run: one to the left, two in the middle, and one on the right.
I dunno if this guy has ever considered a career in dancing, but he should keep in the backup box for when the mid-life crises strikes. Hey, everyone looks good in tights, right?
Say hello to the back of Jen’s purple shirt from Goof Duece (Purple). Apparently she and her team have amazing powers – this season it’s the power to flip anything…anything.
And while some of her teammates had flipped some pretty interesting things, like Mt. Rushmore, there’s nothing more fascinating, more awe-inspiring, that flipping, right up on their heads, all of the damn Golden Girls (and no one even broke a hip – whattya think of that, Betty White? You’ve been flipped.).
Apparently, though, this is Sheila’s doing. Betty White may have been flipped, but you’ve just been blogged. Unfortunately they tell me you’re traveling around Europe or something, like that’s some excuse to not come back and play Football on Thursdays or Mondays. Well we’ll get you on the rebound.
It’s no wonder we make statues of the greatest mythological and historical heroes posing at their finest moments; that’s when they’re the most interesting looking. Who would wanna see Hercules sitting on a bench eating potato chips?
Well take a look at our latest heroin and a soon to be subject of statue creation across Brooklyn. Ashley from Pin-Ups (Carolina) rolls out a strike, then strikes up a pose. She even gave us the clasped hand victory shake. Fabulous. If I had a dozen roses, I would have been throwing them at her feet.
The world needs more heroes and heroins, we thank you Ashley for taking the reigns on this one. The statue will be dedicated in 2015, made entirely out of jade, and will be taking the place of Ms. Liberty south of Manhattan.
Oh, the many season of Rich M. How we’ll miss his whistle, those flip-flops, and the way he so gracefully handled being pushed in the pool by Ashley on his last day of work.
Good Luck in Bean Town and try not to get caught up in The Town (though you can lay-low with us if need be).
You know what it’s like. The ball is in a perfect arc coming down right where you’re standing. You didn’t have to run to where it went and if things keep going this way, it’s likely that you’ll catch the ball without lifting a finger – by accident almost. Then there’s that guy (or that girl).
It’s a lot like that guy (or, again, girl) at the bar who sits down right next to the person you’re chatting up and carries on their own conversation in a volume that renders your voice totally useless. Frustrated, the person you’re with gets up and moves one, forever crushing your hopes of true love (or a one-nighter – it’s ok, we all at least want to have them).
Well every time you reach up to snag that football outta the air, there’s that guy (or girl) right behind or in front or next to or even under sometimes, doing what they can to kill your joy. And they often tend to be damn good at it. At least here you didn’t just waste $12 buying your would-be true love a frilly blue drink with a cocktail umbrella (yes, guys drink them too they just don’t want to admit it).
Well here’s two perfectly great throws gone straight to hell because of that extra body and that extra pair of ever fumbling hands. Topps Attax (Maroon) was going for a long touchdown-bound pass and Run n Chug (Light Blue) was having their own shorter version of the same. To all those bar predators out there, we feel ya.